


hi darling/the end is in sight

by bricksandbones



Series: Mad about the boy [7]
Category: No Fandom, Original Work
Genre: Implied/Referenced Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2019-03-16 12:10:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13636029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bricksandbones/pseuds/bricksandbones
Summary: In memory.





	hi darling/the end is in sight

Hi darling,  
I don’t know how to be angry that sometimes you don’t tell me things.  
That I had to find out from the paper and will never know  
how, or when, or  
why, that I will never  
see you again, in the flesh (in your casket).

I guess that way was kinder.

I wanted to give condolences to your cats. I didn’t know if that would be appropriate.  
I wanted to put my name on your page, but I guess that’s not important. Your death  
is between us. All of us.

You know, I’m glad I don’t know your family.  
I would feel how they feel about it. Just between us, I can say  
I’m okay. There’s no grief, as long as you’re in a better place.  
I’ve always said  
that death is the better place but  
I don’t know now.

When we talked about self-deliverance, this wasn’t quite what I had in mind.

It’s probably weird, but I hope you wanted to die. I hope it was quick. I hope  
you saw the light at the end of the tunnel and that you knew  
I wouldn’t grieve and that’s why you didn’t tell me.

If there were to be one person who could think of your passing as a gift,  
I hope you’ll allow me. You made me laugh and cry and smile, learn the answers  
to geography questions I never cared about, and now you’re making me think.

All the tributes say what a nice kind clever quiet boy you were. And they’re right.   
You always played your cards pretty close to your chest.  
The boy with the ocean eyes never let me fall in love.

Hey darling. I’m saving all your cat photos.

Until our atoms meet again x

**Author's Note:**

> In memory.


End file.
